An Insider's Look at the Mysterious World of BDSM Dungeons

Mainly, if it's on your kinky bucket list, you might be shocked by what happens inside a BDSM dungeon and how it functions.

You've experimented with kink, which involves a little rope, a little more control, and possibly a few forced orgasms. But you're interested in what happens elsewhere. The sounds of dungeons and sex clubs are a touch eerie and strange. While no two locations are precisely the same, many have numerous characteristics. It might be helpful to comprehend how BDS M dungeons operate and what transpires behind closed doors before you assume that they are a spot you can't envision visiting.

Private vs. Public Dungeons

Note that certain dungeons are private, while others are open to the public. Anyone who complies with specified standards, regulations, and procedures is permitted entry to public dungeons. You should have an attendee sponsor you. You could be required to provide identification or submit to a background investigation.

Private dungeons are frequently accessible only by invitation. Only those who have been personally screened by the dungeon owner or a few chosen pals are permitted to enter my favorite dungeon. People are frequently turned away because they are perceived as predators or because they do not follow safe BDSM.

Not Everyone Gets In

Entry will be refused to anyone younger than 18 and maybe 21 if alcohol is served. No matter your age, you will not be allowed to enter a dungeon if identification is required. Additionally, you can be asked to sign statements and waivers. No entrance, no signature. The dungeon may also ban people who disobey dungeon rules.

You shouldn't assume that you'll get in for the evening just because you arrive wearing your finest leather attire. Dungeons tend to be highly selective about who they allow entry to. The entire dungeon could be closed, or worse, if one person violates the law or disregards safety or privacy. Not to mention that you won't be permitted to use your phone inside. This regulation safeguards everyone's privacy and protection.

Expect to Pay a Cover

As enterprises, dungeons have expenses to cover. Staff, electricity, and space are all expensive. Naturally, costs differ from place to place, but it's not uncommon to pay $20 or more per person. Be ready to pay cash for the cover.

There might be memberships available for the dungeon in your area. After paying the annual dues, you will be able to use the space, attend private events, or receive a reduced cover charge. Each club is unique. Before you join, make sure to inquire about the benefits of your membership fee.

Understand Protocols

In a lot of BDSM interactions, protocols are crucial. Averted gaze, specific titles, and speaking just to the "correct" individuals can quickly confuse. The majority of dungeons will either post the rules or explain them during your initial visit. To go over the restrictions, they might even provide an orientation session outside of club hours.

Nonetheless, many dungeons follow specific "standard" procedures:

• Without the submissive's dominant's consent, dominants are not allowed to touch submissives.
• Submissives must utilize honorifics when speaking to any Dominant, not only their own. Although "Sir" and "Ma'am" are frequently used, if you're not sure, ask.
• It is forbidden for dominants to speak to subordinates of other dominants without their consent.

Your local dungeon might have additional procedures. Specific protocols will not be applicable if you are a single submissive. Ask when you're unsure. (Are you curious about the experience of being submissive? Peruse A Day in the Life of a Constantly Compliant Person.

Safety Is Paramount

In the BDSM community, the terms "safe, sane, and consensual" are frequently used. Your safety and everyone else's safety should be your priority from the moment you enter and present your ID until you depart.

You can find dungeon monitors all across a dungeon. They keep an eye on the players to ensure that no one is ignoring the rules, that poor technique isn't endangering anyone's health, and that spectators aren't interfering with the action. If a good monitor senses that a scenario is getting unsafe, they can and will halt all play. A person who disregards the scene or the space of others will also be removed.

Don't Be Afraid to Ask Questions – But Know When to Ask Them

Not every visitor to a dungeon takes part in the performances or scenes. It's OK if you can't picture being in front of people. Some folks merely attend to socialize, watch, and hang around. However, a lot of what you see will be unfamiliar or unusual.

Questions regarding what's happening are standard, but asking someone what they're doing while they're doing it is not acceptable. Ask other onlookers questions quietly unless you notice a sign or have been informed that talking is prohibited in the area. Inquire with the dungeon guard. Asking the participants is best done after the scene is finished and everyone has put their clothing back on. If you ask the correct question at the appropriate moment, most people are delighted to answer it.

Nudity Is the Norm but Not Necessary

I was surprised to see more boobs than I had anticipated when I initially went to a local dungeon: saggy ones, perky ones, big ones, and small ones. Many people arrive at the dungeon wearing their fetish gear, or they change while they're there. Some equipment doesn't allow much room for creativity.

In other instances, nobody takes off their clothes until they start a fight. That's me. I only wear a thong when I'm in a scenario.

It exposes me to whatever my Dominant may have in store. It doesn't follow that everyone is becoming nude just because it's normal and permitted in dungeons. Wearing your street clothes inside the door and leaving them on the entire time is OK.

Not All Dungeons Allow Sex

I visit a dungeon that forbids fluids or penetration. According to the other, as long as you clean up after yourself, anything goes. Each dungeon is unique. When you first arrive, don't assume that strangers will start acting strangely around you. You shouldn't expect to be approached by strangers for your bizarre corner action. (Note that you are free to decline if someone proposes. They should also honor your choice. If they don't, get a dungeon monitor right away.)

It is essential to convey this specific guideline right away. Ask when in doubt, just like you would with anything else. Keep in mind that just because the club permits it doesn't mean you have to have sex. Whether you get busy during a scene or not, no one should make you feel uncomfortable.

Check Your Body and/or Kink Shame at the Door

You will witness things you never would have thought possible when you enter a dungeon, especially after nightfall. Someone may be experimenting with fire. Some will be "tortured," gagged, and shackled. It's likely that someone won't have the body of a supermodel and will be fully nude.

People from many walks of life can be seen having a variety of kinks and fetishes in the dungeon. To show respect, you don't need to appreciate someone's body. Accepting a kink doesn't require you to like it. You can end up staring at the club from the outside... alone if you disrespect someone's body or scene.

The term "dungeon" alone has a gloomy, ominous noise. A BDSM dungeon is actually a location where kinksters can congregate, learn new things, socialize, and have a little fun. Yes, people will be nude and may even engage in sexual activity. Indeed, there are guidelines to adhere to and new information to acquire. The dungeon may and should be a safe place to be your kinky self, but remember that.

Note: Fetlife and word-of-mouth are two excellent sources of information about dungeons in your area. Fetlife can be a gloomy and frightening environment, as some people believe. Additionally, it's a great place to find out about local clubs and kinky folks. You should look through Fetlife to locate a club or dungeon if you don't have any local kinky pals who can direct you.