Solo Sex and Self-Isolation: Bodysex Goes Virtual

This weekly "Erotic Recess" gives me a super-hot, empowered chance to interact with a group of people I love, respect, and adore.

Masturbation is helping a group of over two dozen women stay calm, enjoy themselves, and stay connected during a time when many people's daily routines and customs have been upended. The recurring theme? Carlin Ross and Betty Dodson collaborated on our Bodysex project.

Dodson is a true feminist liberator and the original pioneer of human sexuality. Dodson pushed the limits for women to take charge in the bedroom during her well-known group sex parties in the 1970s. She also didn't stop.

This woman has produced hundreds of works of sensual fine art, published books (Sex for One is the most well-known), and continues to work in private for her sex-positive art. She lives under the motto, "liberating women one orgasm at a time."

Ross is a lawyer, a businessman, and the custodian of all things Betty Dodson. She serves as the Betty Dodson Foundation's president, the primary editor of dodsonandross.com, and the instructor for Bodysex courses and certification.

Meet the Group

Many of the women in this group are trained Bodysex facilitators who conduct workshops in their hometowns across the globe; all of them have worked with Dodson and Ross at some point. The group has met for a week of courses filled with pleasure at Menla, a Buddhist retreat facility in upstate New York, for the previous two summers. These 57 ladies maintain their connection through a private Facebook group in between events.

Carlin, therefore, recommended a Zoom meeting to check in with one another when COVID-19 began to spread throughout the United States. The twenty-two ladies who took part represented nine nations and eight US states. We alternated between sharing things for which we are thankful, things that irritate us, and things we want.

Following their recent appearance on The Goop Lab, Betty and Carlin scheduled a full spring schedule of Bodysex classes, and the waiting list was crowded with over 2000 ladies. Circles in New York and workshops for facilitators worldwide were halted when COVID-19 struck.

After our meeting, we decided that our group should have a shortened virtual Bodysex circle. We are connected to our breath and our bodies through pleasure. The hormone that the brain produces during an orgasm, oxytocin, reduces stress and strengthens the immune system.

Bodysex anchors my entire being, and the sisterhood of this group keeps my head afloat. Bodysex, to put it simply, heals—guilt, humiliation, and a lot more.

The Online Session

I, therefore, make my sacred area every Sunday before our Erotic Recess at 1 pm PST. I cover my sofa with a towel and place a blanket on it. I light some candles and put up the heat. I occasionally establish the tone by listening to Hooverphonic or Portishead. I dress according to the situation; one week, I used my Solid Gold Clit tank to call forth my pussy strength.

I spend some time selecting the sex tools I want to use, which generally include lubrication, a stainless steel barbell, the Womanizer, and my Magic Wand or Le Wand (but today I used CalExotics W.I.L.F. - Wand I'd Like to Fuck). Betty's favorite lubricant, almond oil, is used by several women.

Women who want to take off their clothes do so. Because participants are free to share as much or as little as they like, some really inventive camera perspectives are produced. Or dark, seductive silhouettes. Sharing audio is the only prerequisite.

"Everyone is getting nude!" As ladies join the call, Carlin chuckles.

Over two dozen gorgeous faces are smiling broadly and saying, "Good to see you."

Carlin jokes, "I think this is the hottest ticket in town." (Her opinion is entirely accurate.)

Carlin establishes a goal for the group at the beginning of the call. Within the first week, we sent our orgasmic energy to the COVID-19 crisis frontline workers. Women were the focus of the second week.

"We're taking full responsibility for keeping everyone safe, stable, and fed during this crisis," Carlin says. "The emotional labor being done by women on the front lines of this crisis is not receiving the necessary support."

After warming up with some breathing techniques, we use our wands to trace the seven chakras, beginning at the root chakra, ascending to the crown chakra, and then descending. After giving ourselves a little massage and lubricating our vulvas, we start working.

"Perineum stimulation—that region between your anus and vaginal opening—is my current obsession. Carlin says, "It's like my new thing."

When inserting the barbell (or any other insertable object a lady desires to use), we begin with gentle penetration, squeezing and releasing the pubococcygeus muscle.

"All right, ladies, go ahead and start your engines!" Carlin exclaims.

Each lady masturbates uniquely. While some ladies use rope bondage, others choose Betty's Rock and Roll method. Some sway to their beat while wearing headphones.

One woman gasped, "Oh fuck."

The collective "ahhhhhh-ed."

One woman then questioned, "Who was saying fuck? It was hot.

One woman who was visiting family on Easter Sunday fled to her car for our get-together. It was one of the sexiest things I've ever seen, with her dress hiked up, lovely lingerie, and an unbuttoned top. Watching women enjoy themselves in real-time is euphoric, but listening to the crescendo of actual orgasms erupt, fall, and rise repeatedly is even more energizing.

We pause and inquire about Betty. Since quitting smoking, she has experienced some, uh, moments. We discuss strategies for popularizing virtual body sex. Several of the women sidle their vulvas up their video cameras when we discuss the practicalities of performing Genital Show & Tell. The issue has been resolved.

Following some small talk, we return for another round. Where some of the women reside, it is almost midnight.

Carlin advises, "Get some more orgasms before we go on our way."

I return twice more.

"You all are so beautiful," exclaims one woman, but an orgasm cuts her off.

Why I Love These Sunday Sessions of Self-Love

I have remained anchored to myself, my enjoyment, and a network of fervent sex-positive campaigners thanks to this Erotic Recess throughout an uncertain period. For me, physical closeness went from full blast to nothing because I am polyamorous and live alone.

This weekly exercise gives me a super-hot, empowered connection to a group of people I love, respect, and adore. These Sunday bouts of self-love are the clearest example of Betty's statement that "women are bottomless pits of sexual pleasure."

Our Sunday gatherings have made it possible for Bodysex to go online. Betty and Carlin have been experimenting with this notion for some time for women who were unable to attend classes in person in New York City. Virtual Bodysex offers a chance to introduce a successful healing technique to a global audience. We don't have time to wait, even though it might not be as intimate as the circles in Betty's apartment in New York City.

Right now, we need to connect and use our joy (also known as power). Vulnerable yet enjoyable activities like Bodysex will bring us together while we adjust to a physically distant and self-isolating environment.

In this dark period, connecting with diverse noises, bodies, viewpoints, and pleasure has been my light and my battle against struggle and humiliation. This is something we can accomplish.